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Validation and Self-esteem: Why Prioritizing Self-Approval Matters

Self esteem
Anders Lorentz·Nov 15, 2024· 3 minutes

The person you have to spend the most time listening to in your life is yourself. Try not to lose their respect.

Mark Manson

In a world driven by external judgments and social expectations, the quest for validation can be all-consuming. We often seek approval from others as if our worth depended on it. But what if I told you that there’s something far more valuable than external validation? That something is self-esteem, the inner foundation of self-approval. In this blog post, we’ll explore the crucial difference between validation and self-esteem and why it’s essential to prioritize the latter. Remember this: Validation is approval from others. Self-esteem is approval from yourself. Never sacrifice your self-esteem to gain validation. Validation is easily regained once lost. Self-esteem is not.

Understanding Validation:

Validation, in its simplest form, is the approval and recognition we receive from external sources—friends, family, colleagues, or even strangers. While validation can be gratifying and boost our self-esteem momentarily, it is a fleeting and often unreliable source of self-worth. Seeking validation from others means constantly adapting and molding ourselves to fit their expectations, like a chameleon changing its colors to blend in.

The Illusion of External Validation:

External validation can create an illusion of self-worth based on others’ opinions. This illusion can be deceiving because it’s outside our control. When we tether our self-esteem to external validation, we place our emotional well-being in the hands of others. One moment, we may feel on top of the world, and the next, we may plummet into self-doubt if the validation ceases.

The Power of Self-Esteem:

Self-esteem, on the other hand, is an internal measure of self-worth. It’s about recognizing your intrinsic value as a human being, irrespective of others’ opinions. Building self-esteem involves self-acceptance, self-love, and self-compassion. It means embracing your strengths and acknowledging your weaknesses with kindness, knowing that you are worthy of love and respect simply because you exist. That the real authentic you; is good enough and is worth loving

The Crucial Message:

The key message here is clear: Never sacrifice your self-esteem to gain validation. Validation, as previously stated, can be easily regained once lost. People’s opinions can change, and external circumstances are often unpredictable. But your self-esteem is a steady anchor, an unwavering source of inner strength that sustains you through life’s highs and lows.

In a world where validation often appears to be the golden ticket to self-worth, remember the timeless wisdom: Validation is approval from others. Self-esteem is approval from yourself. Never sacrifice your self-esteem to gain validation. Validation may come and go, but your self-esteem is the steady flame within you, guiding you through life’s uncertainties with resilience, authenticity, and unwavering self-approval. Choose self-esteem as your compass on the journey of self-discovery and self-love, for it is the key to lasting happiness and fulfillment.

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